“The Lover comes … The Lover comes!” ~ Rumi
If we could look again, through virgin eyes, we would see that all is love.
There is a timeless story playing out. A story that repeats itself, over and over, through the eons of time. Where all the stories are the same — in certain ways. And yet, each story is also unique. It is the journey of the soul. The journey of the soul, from the light, into the shadow, and then the return to light. That light is the light of love itself.
However, this story can only be imagined (versus actually realized) by the little self. Imagined by our egos. Yet, it can be experienced by the bigger self (the soul), for the arena of our soul is quite expansive and multidimensional.
As we share our own journey with each other, it would serve us well to remember who we really are. A planet of souls, who have incarnated to master the art of being human. And in order to do that, well, we have chosen to embody all sorts of stigmas and illusions. We have chosen to forget our own truth, and to fall out of grace, and enter the shadow side of humanity.
We are living in perhaps the darkest arena of human potentials. Here, on this planet at this time, there are human beings who have completely immersed themselves in the shadow side of humanity. We, as souls, have chosen to play out every manner of pain and suffering imaginable. Through the corridor of time, our human story has played out fierce pain and suffering, scarring our psyches with some of the deepest scars possible. But what, you might ask, does this have to do with intimacy and unconditional love? Everything.
The lover comes. The lover comes with the eyes that can see the truth. With the eyes that can see past the story. Past the imprinting of our shadows. Well, it might not seem that way when we are actually feeling ourselves as we open up to the vulnerable arena of intimacy. As an individual, with an ego that has been taught all manner of shame, guilt and betrayal, it can seem like the end of us. It can seem as if we would die if we surrender to love.
For most of us, we have loaded up our subconscious with all manner of karmic lessons, lessons that only the most advanced old souls would choose. For we have spent lifetimes playing out the most recent chapters of our collective story. We have, as a collective, experienced ruin of all sorts. Eras of financial depression. Seasons of disease and plague. Sending our children off to fight wars on foreign soil. All manner of loss. All manner of the loss of our loved ones. Loss. The abandonment of love. Through our collective stories.
What does this have to do with love and intimacy? Everything.
When we connect with our beloved, and we bring (again) the light of love, our small self can feel very vulnerable, remembering the loss of love before. Having a sense of…”not again.” It can feel very vulnerable at a very deep level when we enter the arena of intimate love.
Love has no motive of its own. Unconditional love has no condition. Without concern or worry. Unconditional love is actually anchored in the truth. You could say unconditional love IS the truth. But that truth can be of little value to the little self feeling the presence of love, once again.
The reason we have talked about the shadow, of ourselves and of humanity, is to understand what we are to bump up against when we allow ourselves to feel the presence of love. Feel the presence of love. Feel. To feel.
Our feelings are an inside job. In other words, our feelings originate from within ourselves. Our feelings are the consequence of our thoughts and beliefs bumping up against our experience in the moment. In the now. It could help to know that our feelings evolve as we rediscover the truth. Our feelings show us where we are, in the journey back to the light. Our feelings, often stated as our emotions, are actually just messengers. Our emotions are messengers telling us where we see ourselves — as it relates to our truth. We can feel shame, guilt and vulnerability when we believe that we are not safe. Where we feel that we can experience the loss of love, yet again.
It is in the arena of our intimate relationships that we can create the deepest healing. But it takes a skilled soul to navigate the awakening of the karmic imprints of our past. As we dance the dance of love, we open ourselves up. Intimacy is the deeper arena of love. Where we share ourselves with another. Naked and bare. Well, if we are brave enough.
The powerful play of love is to remember. To remember how the other is feeling, however, is out of our control. We, as an intimate partner, cannot own how the other is feeling. Yes, sure, we can be the trigger. But we cannot decide the response. We are not responsible for how the other reacts to us. We are responsible for our behavior, but not responsible for how the feelings rise up, from within, in the persona of our lover.
The intimacy of love starts early in the day, as we begin to hold our beloved in our thoughts of love all day long. Love without attachment or motive. And then, it is almost time for the physical dance of love to begin. Before we enter the den of love. Before the lights come down. And then…the masks come off. Our hearts KNOW the presence of love. Our trust of love is easier, too. To feel the love in the mundane times, all through the day, gives our hearts an understanding. A trust. To feel the presence of love, as we share the mundane, is setting the stage of a deeper love. Our hearts can connect with each other long before the shadow sides of our identities are awakened.
There is an ebb and flow to deepening our love. To share our times of feeling vulnerable. To feel the edge within ourselves as we feel the scars of our past become illuminated by the love of another. And there is a whole new realm, when the lovers can see the bigger truth. Where the lovers know the bigger story, which is that the shadows that are awakened in the other are not to be taken personally.
Love grows us. It opens us. It shines a light deeper within us. And by doing that, it allows us to show up in a bigger love. The unconditional love that our souls have for us. Divine love revealed. Love you!