Paying The Price For Inner Peace

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    It costs so much to become a whole human being that there are very few who have the enlightenment, or the courage, to pay the price. One has to abandon altogether the search for certainty and security, and reach out with both arms to embrace life with energy and passion. Like a lover, one has to embrace the world and their being alive within it. One has to accept both pain and pleasure as a condition of existence. One has to accept doubt and darkness as the cost of learning and having new experiences. One needs a will that is strong but flexible, and one that is always open to accept every consequence of their choices and actions.

    Only when we embrace dying as a certain aspect of living do we stand any chance of creating success. I define success as "any state or condition with which you are content." There is a psychological price people must pay for being at peace within themselves and being content with their lives.

    Most people I know are rather desperately seeking inner peace and contentment. They are unhappy with their marriages, their jobs, their children, their finances, their "lot in life." They are unhappy with themselves. They long for inner peace and happiness. They seek it, but are unaware of the price it costs.

    Here is a partial list of some of the costs for inner peace.

    1: You must practice thinking and acting spontaneously and in the present, rather than from fears or resentments rooted in your past experience. Even if that experience was yesterday!

    2: You must give up your clinging to negative emotions and develop an unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment.

    3: You must lose all interest in judging others, as well as lose the habit of judging yourself. Negatively judging or criticism of yourself or others only generates inner turmoil.

    4: You need to lose all interest in interpreting the thoughts, actions, and feelings of others. Your interpretation is always distorted.

    5: You will lose interest in winning conflicts and aggressively attacking others in order to "win" your point or your position.

    6: You will need to give up your ability to worry or become anxious over conditions you cannot control.

    7: You will have to immediately let go of frustrations and resentments when they occur within, and replace them with empathy and compassion.

    8: You will need to give up the tendency to be in control and learn to let things happen rather than force them or "make them happen."

    9: You must give up the illusion you can change how others choose, how they think, how they feel and how they behave.

    10: You must tolerate more frequent and overwhelming episodes of appreciation for yourself and others.

    11: You will need to learn to be fully satisfied with feelings of connectedness with other human beings and with nature.

    12: You will have to quit the habit of frowning and replace it with smiles and (of all things) "cheerfulness."

    13: You must give up your fear and denial of death and allow it to become a natural part of being alive.

    14: You will have to develop a regular habit of enjoying the condition of being alive.

    15: Above all, you will have to tolerate and sustain an increase in your desire to love yourself and others as precious human beings.

    16: Most of all, you will have to modify your thinking habits, your emotional habits and your addictions so they create the life you genuinely desire.

    It is obvious the price list for inner peace is rather long and tends to pose a serious threat to human hate, violence, rage, injustice and war. Are you willing to pay the price for it?

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    Lloyd J. Thomas PhD
    Lloyd J. Thomas, Ph.D., has 30+ years experience as a Life Coach and Licensed Psychologist. He is available for coaching in any area presented in "Practical Psychology." As your Coach, his only agenda is to assist you in creating the lifestyle you genuinely desire. The initial coaching session is free. Contact him at 970.568.0173 or e-mail DrLloyd@CreatingLeaders.com. Visit the website www.lifecoachtraining.com. To subscribe to his weekly column, Practical Psychology, e-mail your request to: PracticalPsychology-On@lists.webvalence.com and write "subscribe" in the subject line and an "X" in the body. Copyright

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