Here and Now



Back in the 1980s I found myself squeezing my way through the narrow aisles of the Bodhi Tree Bookstore in West Hollywood, California. Known for its extensive selection of books about things spiritual, the little shop was the place to troll for must-have reading material. I was on the alert for what I thought “should” be in my library, even if I wasn’t much interested in the subject. My collection of books grew over time, but languished on my bookshelf for years, many unread, and eventually I realized that few of the classic teachings spoke to me.

Perhaps I had learned what I needed in a previous life, or perhaps the messages had become irrelevant to me, I didn’t know. What I do remember is being bored with long, deep explanations of things that seemed aimed at educating my mind but never seemed to touch my life. What I was reading had no more aliveness for me than the dry lessons of my Christian youth, no matter what culture or what revered teacher was being represented. In my view, philosophies tend to entertain the mind and teachers aren’t meant to be worshipped.

For all the words with which I surrounded myself, I gained no satisfaction save the notion that I had a book collection worthy of a serious seeker. Too serious. Eventually I boxed up most of my books and, not without irony, shipped them off to the Bodhi Tree where they were sold in their used book store.

I am a baby boomer, and I share a certain story with my compatriots. A good number of us have spent the past 30 years or more in a slow unraveling and revealing. The unraveling often begins in crisis and continues to the revelation. Then we repeat the process. One would think we’re a slow bunch, but we’ve really just had a lot to do. Many are the pathways, and eventually we find ourselves on one that matches us.

I can now know gratitude for my earlier years of debilitating depression and for the psychologist I found to assist. Turns out that the traditional aspect of her therapy was of little help, but the deeper awareness of this therapist showed up at my first session. She asked me to read a book, and so I did. That book was The Nature of Personal Reality by Seth, as channeled by Jane Roberts. Finally, something spoke to me and my pathway opened. Natasha, I don’t know where you are, but my heart and soul thank you for your unconventional guidance. I also acknowledge that my awareness of channeling then opened my path to eventually intersect with that of Michele Mayama. For that I am profoundly grateful.

My predilections took me in the direction of consciousness, not necessarily toward the academic, but as a techie curious about the workings of an evolving universal structure within which creation comes to be. I say “evolving,” because in my view the structure is changing. In other words, we are not only awakening or becoming conscious, we are also changing what we are waking up within.

Some teachings prefer to relegate matter (and bodies) to an inferior status. I would say that the evolution of a material body with an emotional component has been a Divine plan for fusing Spirit within a physical experience. Similar teachings would say that we are ascending into light or becoming some nebulous oneness. I would say that there is a vibrational ascension of Matter and Life, and a simultaneous descending of Spirit and Light, creating an alchemical fusion into a new form. We could call this new form Living Light.

There also exist teachings of salvation in the form of someone coming; Jesus, Maitreya, ETs, or others we name superior in some way. I would echo the Hopi Indians who say that we are the ones we have been waiting for.

We are the ones who have been releasing old structures of consciousness through our processes of healing and coming into alignment. We are the ones who are embodying greater aspects of soul as we recover lost fragments of self and fuse more deeply into Life. We are the ones dissolving the past so that living in the now becomes possible, and more than a mantra. We are the ones who, through our willingness to enter and transmute a vast karmic story, are now becoming something that has never before been in existence. We are Creator, becoming conscious within Creation. This is no small thing.

And this is all happening here. And now.

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  1. Thank you Chris for your excellent musings, as always. Yes, I often ponder if we baby boomers are all very slow learners and the Universe has benevolently given us a large chunk of our life spans to get with the program. On the other hand, as you say, our process towards conscious creation is no small thing and there doesn’t seem to be any handy Cliff Notes or cheat sheets. I have always had an unsettling feeling that my voluminous self-help collection will not really get me where I need to go. Darn…no short cuts to consciousness!


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