Pause…Reflection

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For this writer, today is 09-09-09, and I just returned from a much-appreciated vacation away from the routines connected with running one’s own business. For many in the New Age community, today was purported to represent another major moment in our grand adventure of personal and planetary transformation. Perhaps the numbers representing this date do mean something beyond a poetic interpretation of our times, but as planetary work goes I guess I’m still on vacation since I have felt no impulse of energy moving me beyond my routine. In fact, I’m surprised at the stillness given the amount of astrological and channeled material speaking to the significance of this configuration of digits.

lafontaineToday I’m feeling like my life is rather normal, whatever that is, instead of being immersed in a process only certain compatriots might understand. The intensity of deep, personal transformative work seems to have waned, and some part of me feels done. I’m feeling ready for a personal shift with the mystery yet to be revealed. My recent days spent far away from home altered my daily rhythm and served to pull me out of a habitual way of seeing only through the lens of being part of the change I want to see, or any other pithy aphorism that comes to mind.

I have finally achieved peacefulness from the eons-long process I have undertaken to arrive at this moment. The experience to date has been large, taxing, full and painful at times, and I’m sensing that beyond this resting point I will begin feeling the urge to move on. If we are all players on a stage, I have closed the last show of an old story and I’m taking a breather before diving in to a new production. I’m counting on the playwright to come up with an interesting plot and to give me some good lines. Oh, wait, the playwright is me. I hope I know what I’m doing.

Even reflecting on just this one life brings amazement at how much I have been through and managed to transform. I am finally able to appreciate the need for the experiences I have had, and I can see what a stunning amount of transformation has been accomplished by all of us who have been participants in the story. I won’t say I feel abundant gratitude for the full depth of struggle endured, but I do hold a sense of appreciation for the process of soul growth bringing us to this moment. The birthing of a new reality is bringing new challenges, but certainly not the kind we have learned to negotiate.

If you are a Baby Boomer like me, you have spent your entire life healing and shifting structures of consciousness on behalf of yourself and the whole. We were the transformers, dismantling the old to make way for the new. Perhaps the current challenge is not one of more healing and transmuting but re-learning how to be a creator. The skill set we grew for dismantling and working our way through the darkest of times is likely to be of less benefit going forward.

This moment in our evolution offers a special opportunity for those who choose it. We can die to a previous life and re-enter another without leaving the body. If you have been feeling an undefinable grief you may be in the process of making the transition. Saying goodbye to what has been familiar and meaningful brings emotion, even when saying goodbye to something that has been painful. We have long been in a phase of our journey marked by forgetfulness. We forgot that we have been through many experiences of life, some lived in joy, flow and endless creation with others offering heavy challenges. The descent into density may have been necessary, but it hasn’t been fun.

A new story now debuts and it brings experiences of fresh creation and wonder. The promise of a life without struggle doesn’t mean we won’t be active; it just means we can drop our old sense of drudgery and efforting. Such a shift may take some adjustment for this old Baby Boomer, but I’m certainly willing to give it a go. I’ll be ready any time now, but forgive me if first I spend just a little more time pausing to reflect.

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