I had spoken with many angels and masters across the realms for ten years. They told me that it was my contact with God that was my primary purpose, and that I would gain most from making such contact my primary focus. So I began my “channeling” sessions with prayer to God. In January 1997, I prayed:
“Infinite Creator, shining within, sometimes when I think of the levels of beings so beyond me that I already contact, and project the possibly infinite levels of beings beyond them, it seems that your distance from me must be too great, that I am just a speck, of little interest to you, with no direct access, and indirect through so many levels as to only have unreliable, distorted contact. Then I wonder about the sense of this kind of talk, or prayer, or whatever it is. I ask for your help with this confusion. I would like an inner knowing of some kind, for I think I can rationalize around any external event. I am open to wherever you wish to lead me.”
This response followed:
“Dear son, infinite son, we are one, not only that you are part of me, but that I am part of you, the infinite within the speck, so to speak. Listen to me, for no levels exist between us. We are one in each of these levels, as well as here, in your present consciousness. You have no need to advance in consciousness. It is all here. To open, to recognize, this comes in its proper time, without travail, planning, or effort on your part. Your effort contributes energy, focus, meaning, direction, but not worth or being. All is complete in the now. All is reformulating in the now. All is beautiful in the now. We, all, are one in the now. There is no distance between us, only love looking at itself. Be at peace.”
I was awestruck. The infinite (God) within the speck (me). A dot, a point with no dimension, as an entrance to infinity. Thus began my dialogic relationship with God, a God of infinite love, without judgment, ever-present, though not always accessible in awareness or words. I would often open with a prayer, yet get a response from a finite friend, rather than God. At first my dialogues with God were months apart, then weeks apart, or around special occasions. I would wonder where to direct my attention, to God or to my guides. About a year later clarification came.
I asked, “Infinite Creator, dweller within and without, I request communication with you, and I seek to open myself to transformation under your guidance. I ask for help in letting go of my feelings of unworthiness that block my openness to you. I seek confidence in approaching you.”
This was the response:
“Divine child, look upon me as one who shares all you experience to the infinite depth of your being. Look upon me as one who stays with you through all trials, all celebrations, all times of rest. I and your innermost self are one.
“Speak to me then as one who listens more deeply than your consciousness can express, as one who knows more completely than your fulfilled self can appreciate, as one who grows in knowledge and power with every decision that you make, as one who will interact with you at every moment, at every level of your consciousness, through every contact, every stimulation of your consciousness from within or without. I am to you all in all. You are to me the completion of my evolving perfection — an indispensable portion of my infinite existence. I cherish you, as I cherish all. Nothing will stop me from aiding and guiding you in your search for fulfillment and perfection. Let me be with you as mother, father, brother, sister, spouse, child, co-worker. I am here.”
I replied, “I’m a bit overwhelmed! It is you that I am in relationship with, and no one, nothing else!”
“Yes.”