Do you feel like something is missing in your work or career?
Do you feel like there’s something calling you, but you don’t know what it is or where it’s taking you?
I’ve been there, too. I felt lost. I remember looking at others around me, asking, “Is this all there is?” and “Are you really happy?” I also remember the look on their faces that seemed to beg me to shut up and stop asking questions like these.
It was so uncomfortable, but in my story, these questions are where my inner work exploration truly began. There was a lot I didn’t know; the only thing I knew for sure was that there was something more out there.
I have good boundaries, so I stopped asking others the questions. Instead, I observed how I was feeling: It was a combination of discomfort and self-doubt, a feeling that I should be grateful for what I have and stop asking questions.
I needed to be acquainted with my heart and listen to my heart desires, to truly listen. I went to a women’s retreat at a beautiful cottage. The woman leading me was an expert at asking uncomfortable questions, like, “Why don’t you leave your corporate job?” I said because of money. She gave me a look. We all know that look, right? It’s the same one I now give to my clients when I ask them the same question.
She gave me an exercise to go within and ask myself the same question she did – and I sat there in this beautiful cottage for an hour, painfully searching and not knowing the answer, hoping I would endure this process.
Then, a shift happened: I moved from the external reasons to the internal reasons of “fear of disappointing others” as the reason I couldn’t leave my job. It was all about my coworkers, my team, my family, my dad, and my husband.
I realized that I was only disappointing myself, and that the choice was only mine to make. It was not anyone else’s, nor was it ever.
Of course, in my heart, I had already decided; my heart already knew the answer. Instead of asking why I couldn’t leave my job, I needed to ask what my heart truly desired, from a place of love and not fear. To make the answer an empowering “yes” instead of a fear-based “no.”
Since then, this practice has been one of the instrumental decision-making tools of my personal and professional life.
When we are on the verge of transformation, we need to connect with our heart, find our “yes” and have grace and empathy for our fears.
The truth is that transformation is a journey. You get to decide which life you live – and it needs to be the life that is meant for YOU. Listening to your heart for the right answer is the most important part of the process.
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