This is my personal story on labels. It may not be everyone’s story, but it is mine. In an “enlightened” moment, I realized how much my “labeling” had affected my relationships and my expectations of the people I love most. Of all the light bulb moments I have had, where things become crystal clear for me, this has been one of the most life-changing.

drop labels heal relationshipsImage by 愚木混株 Cdd20 from Pixabay

My first realization was that my expectations of my parents were very high. They are my parents. They should know me, what I want, how I think, and what I need. They should know my triggers and what to say and not say around me. I am 60 years old and found myself still expecting, just like I did when I was young, for them to “get me”. The funny thing, I don’t even “get me” sometimes. But they should. They are my parents. My enlightened moment was when I realized my parents are people. People with wounds from childhood, people with worries and problems, joys and dreams, confusion and wants, and still trying to figure themselves out. When I took the “parent” label off, I saw them as people for the first time. They were people, just like me.

My sisters. That label comes with expectations. My sisters should be this or that because they are my sisters. Take the label off and they are just like me. Suddenly the expectations disappear, and I am able to see them in a new light.

I have put expectations on all the relationships I have labeled in my life. My sons, grandchildren, daughters-in-law, friends, and spouse. With each of those labels came expectations of what I thought they should do for me, how they should know me, and how they should relate to me and interact with me. Once I took the labels off, I enjoyed them more, as people. Just like me. This realization has changed me. It has changed my relationships. They are people, just like me.

In love and in light and everything bright and beautiful,

Holly Busse
Tiny Imperfections, LLC
Author/Creator, Speaker, Reiki Master, Personal Trainer


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