Do you ever witness those moments of shame in your life? When you do something – you don’t want to do, or know is not in your best interest and then you feel badly about it afterward? I know I have and do. And I also know through my own journey and healing process that change is possible and the cycle time with shame can stop.
The cosmic giggle is that shame often leads to more shame. It is what has kept each of us both programmable by the heavier issues on our planet and controlled by others – whether it is through our ancestry, religion, education, government. It is shame that keeps us stuck, small, and pulls us away from our Self.
We do something we didn’t want to do. We feel shame – which includes that embarrassed, bad feeling within. This feeling amplifies and as it grows in the shadows, it leads us back into the action we are trying to lift, and the cycle continues. Unless it is interrupted. I found I am able to bring a balm to the shame cycle through identifying my actions, feelings and thoughts and why that action/feeling state is there.
Shifting the Shame Cycle:
- Get curious about the experience – that creates the thought that leads to the feeling that leads to the emotion, that propels the action that feeds the next cycle of experience- thought- feeling- emotion- action- experience state. Journal it. Trace it back through the cycle to what you are conscious of and what you are not.
- Bring awareness to your cycle. By doing so you will interrupt the above shame cycle sooner. When you notice the thought you may say aha I see and can change this. Or perhaps you notice the emotion? Whatever part of the cycle you note, how can you create a pause long enough to choose something different?
- Bring compassion to the process. We do not need to replace shame with further shame when we start to witness our cycle time. Compassion and love will bring with it healing and shift us into freedom instead of into a deeper wound.
So take the ingredients of curiosity, awareness and compassion and change your cycle time. Get free and return to your Self and the light and potential within and around you. Want support? Reach out. Connection is a powerful antidote to shame.