I never expected that a hypnotherapy classroom would be the place where my spiritual healing truly began. But as I sat in core classes at the Hypnosis Motivation Institute (HMI), learning about the power of suggestion, subconscious beliefs, and the role of trance in shaping behavior, something clicked inside me – a light bulb moment that began to illuminate the shadows left behind by decades in a high-demand religion.
For over 20 years, I was part of the Quiverful movement – a deeply conservative religious group that emphasizes patriarchal control, strict gender roles, and the idea that having as many children as possible is a spiritual duty. I had ten children with my now ex-husband. I was obedient. I was devout. I was exhausted.
As my children grew and I began to mature emotionally and spiritually, questions started to surface – quietly at first, then with the force of a tidal wave. I began to see the cognitive dissonance between the loving, expansive life I craved and the restrictive, fear-based theology I had been taught to uphold. Eventually, I made the painful but necessary choice to leave both the movement and my marriage.
But escaping a belief system is not the same as healing from it.
I still struggled with anxiety, with self-doubt, with the aching need to be “good enough” – as if some unseen divine authority were still watching and waiting to punish me for stepping out of line. I couldn’t understand how people clung so fiercely to dogma, often at the expense of connection, creativity, and self-worth. I wanted freedom, but part of me was still in chains.
Then, in a course on the structure of trance states, I had a profound realization: many religious ceremonies contain elements of hypnosis. The repetition of prayers, the rhythmic music, the heightened emotional states, and the authoritative language – all of these bypass the critical filter and sink deeply into the subconscious mind. This is not inherently good or bad, but it is powerful. And for those raised in high-demand religions, that power can be used to condition shame, obedience, and fear as spiritual virtues.
As I continued my training, I began to understand the neurological and emotional underpinnings of this kind of religious trauma. One quote from Laura E. Anderson’s When Religion Hurts You struck me deeply:
“Looking at high demand religion through the lens of the nervous system will help us understand the impact of the teachings and practices.”
This insight – coupled with my hypnotherapy education – gave me a new mission. Today, I help others explore the subconscious programming left behind by strict religious upbringings. Using hypnosis, Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), and guided inner work, my clients learn to replace fear with curiosity, shame with self-compassion, and obedience with authentic spiritual autonomy.
Religious trauma is real. But so is the healing that comes from reclaiming the most sacred part of all – your own mind.
