Dear Shannon,
I have three kids under ten. My kids walk all over me! But I don’t want to put down harsh limits, because my parents hit me when I was little, and I am afraid I’m going to raise my hand to them. They are totally getting on my nerves, though, and I’m close to my breaking point. How can I become the spiritually serene mother I would love to be?
Thanks,
Mommmyyyy
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Dear Mommmyyy,
Your awareness of your family history already shows that you will be able to say out loud, “I am losing my temper, I need to step outside for a minute” instead of spanking your children. Telling your kids what’s ok with you and what is not ok with you demonstrates “consent,” which is very important for their future relationships. You are allowed to state what you want, for your household. Therapy on boundaries and co-dependence, especially people-pleasing, will go a long way for you. Try these books first: Co-Dependent No More and Boundaries
Always remember #YouAreGuided,
Shannon
Hello Shannon,
My city is totally work and status-oriented. I can’t meet any new friends who aren’t into, “Who do you know? Are you important? How much do you earn?” I signed up for a therapeutic dance class and also a cacao ceremony to meet new people. Anything else I can try?
Signed,
More Than My LinkedIn
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Dear More Than My LinkedIn,
You’re on the right track. However! The same classist / success-only people who live in your city will also be attending those ceremonies and classes. Learn how to steer conversations when they turn competitive with re-directs like these examples: 1. Let’s talk about books/ podcasts we’re loving right now 2. Do you journal? How do you remember your dreams at night? 3. It’s becoming more important to me to be eco-friendly at home, and I’ve tried this hack. How about you?
Always remember #YouAreGuided,
Shannon
Shannon Walbran is an advice columnist for The Edge Magazine. She is a certified intuitive life coach, practicing since 2003. Shannon helps clients worldwide and is based in both St. Paul, Minnesota, and Johannesburg, South Africa. Her website is ShannonWalbran.com
Send your “Dear Shannon” questions to info@shannonwalbran.com. All letters will be read with care, but only those chosen for publication will be answered.
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