Animals say the Darndest Things

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“Share the funniest experience you’ve had with your pet.” When I read The Edge’s theme for this month, it caused some writer’s block. As a long-time animal lover turned professional animal communicator, I have had many “funny” experiences with animals. Unfortunately, none of them were such elaborate tales that would warrant creation of a full-length article. Then the brilliant thought came: Why not take some of the funny “one-liners” that animals come up with during animal communication sessions and write up something like “Animals Say the Darndest Things” (a takeoff on the old TV show “Kids Say the Darndest Things” that was so popular when I was growing up)?

Alas, the universe and some particularly active “other world beings” had other ideas! Instead of using one of the common meanings of the word funny – causing laughter or amusement; humorous – I was to write about the recent happenings in my animal communication practice which would be more accurately classified under the other common meaning of funny: difficult to explain or understand; strange, unusual or odd; curious. It became clear to me that my article was to deal with the extraterrestrial stories that have been coming up with ever greater frequency in my dealings with animals.

My own first “encounter of the third kind” happened a few years ago with a very mainstream client who lives in the countryside of Indiana. We had worked together many times over the years, and due to our successful sessions she trusted my animal communication skills without question.

She called to tell me about strange seizure-like episodes one of her dogs started having out of the blue, which were not actually seizures, according to her vet, but something they had never seen before and had not been able to successfully diagnose or treat. We talked to the dog, who immediately sent me a telepathic image of what caused her new condition. I was amazed to see an incredibly intense bright light in the shape of a flying saucer in the night sky. She said the saucer had suddenly arrived in the middle of the night, blasted a huge electromagnetic field that lit up the entire night sky and then disappeared. She felt her seizure-like conditions had begun as a result of that blast of energy.

My client breeds and shows Border Collies, and in nice weather they all sleep outside in adjacent kennels. I asked the other dogs if they had seen anything, and sure enough, the dog’s son recounted the exact scenario, but said he had not been physically affected. According to the mother dog, the blast affected her and not the others because the aliens were studying her. I was astounded that she used the word aliens, and I was trying to figure out how to broach this “funny” subject with my human client! Because we had had such a successful track record over the years with our animal communication sessions, I felt I could tell her what I found out. The phone was quiet for a while, and then much to my relief, she sighed and said, “I figured something weird was going on.”

This session resulted in more conversations during which I was able to dialogue with the aliens themselves. From the beginning we agreed that the word alien can have a negative connotation for us earthlings, so they suggested using the term extraterrestrials or ETs. In my more recent conversations with other animals and their extraterrestrial experiences, the term “other world beings” was suggested as an even more neutral phrase.

The other world beings stated that they were simply studying earth and its inhabitants for the greater good of all. They were apologetic that their first encounter had so negatively affected the dog and promised to make sure that future studies would not be in any way harmful. We negotiated a time frame for continued studies after which they would leave the area. They kept their word, never to be heard from again. The dog’s symptoms disappeared as mysteriously as they had appeared.

Since then, there have been other reports from animals about studies going on and experiences of being transported and then returned. The most recent was just resolved after one particular cat had been missing for six weeks! I kept receiving information that the cat was alive, but nothing more. I had spoken to him several times before, but never before had I been shut out in the eight years of my professional career like I was with this cat now.

Sheldon the cat: "I had this mission, being involved with another world."

Sheldon the cat mysteriously reappeared two weeks ago.

When we spoke to him about what had happened and why there had been no communication, he related the following:

“I had this mission, being involved with another world. I went (was taken) to do mutual study and exploration. My information is gathered and then transferred to a type of kitty cat archive, and all memory of it is gone. They take information from me and do who knows what with it. It’s all good, that I know. At this point, it’s helping with the survival of our planet, that I know for sure. The other world went through a similar process, with not such a great ending. We will avoid that with their help, luckily.

“I am chosen because my family and I are open to this process. It’s a sacrifice we are all willing to make, especially now that they understand it better. It could happen again, but I think not. There was a huge information download and exchange this time. The astrological format was extremely conducive. That’s why it took so long.”

Tim Miejan’s editorial in last month’s issue, entitled “Are we open to off-planet assistance in our evolution?” was at least partially addressed by an orange tabby named Sheldon who is obviously open to “other world being” help. Who’s next?

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Lena Swanson
Lena Swanson is a professional animal communicator, psychic, shamanic healer, past life regression facilitator and Reiki master. She is known for her accuracy and wonderful rapport with both people and animals. Lena does phone consultations, teaches a variety of animal communication and shamanic journeying classes and is also available as a speaker for special events. She has spoken often at Edge Life Holistic Expos.

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